Channels ▼

Jocelyn Paine

Dr. Dobb's Bloggers

How to Waste a PhD

May 18, 2008

We all love hearing of others' misfortunes; it's such a relief from predicting our own. So here for your Monday morning is a brief cautionary tale I found in Gordon Rugg and Marian Petre's excellent book The Unwritten Rules of Phd Research. Dear reader, do not try this yourself.

An agriculture student started an undergraduate research project on growth rates in mushrooms, something of great interest to mushroom farmers. The student took over a mushroom shed for a term, composted and cultivated, measured heights and regressed least squares. The mushrooms, it turned out, grew not at a constant rate, nor in daily cycles, but in stages a few hours long. This astonishing effect clearly had to be investigated further; so, after writing it up in a dissertation, the student duly took Finals, applied to start a PhD,  commandeered the mushroom shed for the duration. Mountains of experimental data on all kinds of mushroom ensued. All exhibited the effect.

The student finished collecting data, wrote up, submitted; the day came for the viva. Questions about composts, about fertilisers, about statistical analysis and error bounds: all was going well. Until the external examiner asked, "I take it you did allow for the heating?".

The student had, in effect, wasted three years — three years and a term, if you count the undergraduate dissertation — timing central heating in the mushroom shed.

Related Reading

More Insights

Currently we allow the following HTML tags in comments:

Single tags

These tags can be used alone and don't need an ending tag.

<br> Defines a single line break

<hr> Defines a horizontal line

Matching tags

These require an ending tag - e.g. <i>italic text</i>

<a> Defines an anchor

<b> Defines bold text

<big> Defines big text

<blockquote> Defines a long quotation

<caption> Defines a table caption

<cite> Defines a citation

<code> Defines computer code text

<em> Defines emphasized text

<fieldset> Defines a border around elements in a form

<h1> This is heading 1

<h2> This is heading 2

<h3> This is heading 3

<h4> This is heading 4

<h5> This is heading 5

<h6> This is heading 6

<i> Defines italic text

<p> Defines a paragraph

<pre> Defines preformatted text

<q> Defines a short quotation

<samp> Defines sample computer code text

<small> Defines small text

<span> Defines a section in a document

<s> Defines strikethrough text

<strike> Defines strikethrough text

<strong> Defines strong text

<sub> Defines subscripted text

<sup> Defines superscripted text

<u> Defines underlined text

Dr. Dobb's encourages readers to engage in spirited, healthy debate, including taking us to task. However, Dr. Dobb's moderates all comments posted to our site, and reserves the right to modify or remove any content that it determines to be derogatory, offensive, inflammatory, vulgar, irrelevant/off-topic, racist or obvious marketing or spam. Dr. Dobb's further reserves the right to disable the profile of any commenter participating in said activities.

Disqus Tips To upload an avatar photo, first complete your Disqus profile. | View the list of supported HTML tags you can use to style comments. | Please read our commenting policy.